Headlines for Today

COMPUTER DEVELOPS CANCER.

The PC in my room has cancer. Hardware cancer. Terminal stage. Its days are limited and I predict that sometime in February it will shut down, never to function again. It’s sad, really. It’s been with me for more than 5 years already. It lived a good life. I need to find a replacement. Sheesh.

BOOKS GOING EXTINCT!

I miss reading a good old fashioned book. Something I could lug around and read a few pages every now and then while enjoying a cup of coffee. It’s been a while since I last did that. Heck, I even read Harry Potter 7 in an e-book. Imagine my headache after every reading session. The last "real" book I read was a history book. More or less 6 months ago. About the politics of the Cold War. Yes, it was geeky, i know.

SHOE-EATING DOG CAUGHT BY LOCAL AUTHORITIES.

I wish my dog would stop chewing on my shoes like it was some sort of a steak or bone. I found out earlier that some of my shoes (especially the leather ones) have bite marks already. When asked why he loves biting the shoes, the dog could only smile. Sinister. Tsk. Tsk. (more…)

Paintball Fun

Last Saturday, we had our monthly company recreation activity in GlobalGutz along Macapagal Ave. just right in front of the World Trade Center. I was very excited about playing paintball again after several months of hiatus and the idea of being able to play real life Counterstrike was bliss. It was the first time for most of my officemates and I know they’d have a great time playing paintball as I did when I first fired my marker a few years ago. Truth be told, I was at first contemplating on the idea whether i would refrain from shooting female officemates or just shoot the crap out of everyone. On the field, I just shot my marker at every opponent I could spot from my hiding place. 

GlobalGutz had two arenas, a speedball type and jungle type (woodsball). Speedball is where man-made bunkers serve as obstacles. The area is similar to a basketball court (or a little bigger). Each team can see each other from their starting positions and can already shoot at each other as soon as the signal to commence firing is given. Game time is shorter as the rate of elimination of players are very fast. The woodsball arena on the other hand is slightly bigger that the speedball arena. Trees and foliage are aplenty and serve great hiding places. There are also several man-made obstacles such as kawayan walls and make-shift houses. Normally, woodsball is set up in bigger land area. The gameplay is more tactical and usually takes longer than speedball games.  (more…)

The New Joker is Dead

Heath Ledger was 28.

Heath Ledger was found dead a few hours ago in an apartment in the posh district of Soho in New York. As of press time, it is believed that he died from drug overdose. Truly, this is a loss to many of his fans and the whole Australian community. He was catapaulted to international stardom in his portrayal of a gay cowboy in the academy award winning movie, Brokeback Mountain. His much awaited portrayal as the Joker the the new Batman Movie. Dark Knight is scheduled to be released sometime this year. 

I remember the time when I had to make a ten page paper on his movie, A Knight’s Tale, for my advanced history class back in college. I had to watch the movie over and over again just to be able to criticize every detail of the plot, setting, costume, etc. So in a sense, I was made into a fan of the guy. But I have to say his role as Skip in the Lords of Dogtown has to be one of his best roles and acting stints ever.

Truth be told, I’d rather have Britney Spears suffer from overdose than have a very celebrated and multi-awarded actor go out like this. Sigh. It is really a loss. I dunno if he has a kid or what. I heard he has one from Michelle Williams. Sigh. But hey, this is life. One day, you’re partying it up like a rockstar and the next day you’re dead. I just hope the Hollywood chismoso and chismosas won’t create stupid rumors about his death. 

This blog post is for you Heath. You will be remembered.

For more news check out:

• CNN : Actor Heath Ledger Dies at 28
• AFP : Heath Ledger Found Dead

Chapter 1.1 : The Awakening

The boy was breathing heavily. His ears twitched as he tried to listen for movement deep in the forest’s vast labyrinth. There was silence. Not even the birds were chirping. Only the sound of his pounding heart rang in his ears. He squinted his eyes, looking hard for the aggressors that have made their presence well felt moments ago. They were gone. Or so his eyes tell him so. He was crouched behind a mighty baobab, which helpfully sheltered him from the onslaught that occurred. His hand crept the ground for the nearest weapon he can find. A shank-like stick lie innocently nearby. (more…)

Sleepy Random Office Post

I'm sleepy. Right now I'm forcing myself to write just to be able to keep my eyelids open. If you could only see me, I'm already half-slouched half-lying down my chair here in the office. The air conditioning is not helping. I'm freezing here. This is a random post. I'm just blabbering here. Nothing intellectual to say. No genius coming out of mouth. You see, I usually talk when I blog. Now, I'm just snorting and grunting. And it's only minutes past 9 AM. Gawd. My back is hurting. Maybe I should shift from my sitting position already. Argh. But I'm too lazy to do that. I couldn't even hold my head up right. I'm too big for this chair. Or this chair is too small for me. Feels like a pencil being cramped inside a matchbox. Or a phonebooth being forced inside a toddler's backpack. It is cold in here. Now I know why Santa Claus is fat. You need to be fat if you want to live in the North Pole. Random. Digress. Brrr….. I fell asleep earlier in one of the sofas in one of the conference rooms. That didn't help. Now I have stiff neck. Brrr…. James just entered the office. He's our technical guy around here. I heard he was sick the past few days. He does look a little pale.

Hmm… Tsk. tsk. my drawers are a mess. Looks like I have to organize them again. Everything is jumbled up. Important documents should be stored separately from my toiletries and office supplies and sports gear. Right now, the second drawer holds my legal government stuff like NBI clearance, bank documents, contracts, BIR stuff and other papers along with my toothbrush, toothpaste, hair cuticle, my office mug, my pingpong racket and a container of toothpicks. Tsk. Tsk. My first drawer is also a mess. All my office supplies are all mixed up with my snacks and notebooks and shades. I don't even want to look what mess is in store for me with the rest of the drawers. Nuninuninu… (more…)

The Bill Gates Retirement Video

THIS IS WHY NERDS RULE. 

http://view.break.com/429420 - Watch more free videos

To all of you who haven't heard of the news yet, Bill Gates announced his retirement by July this year. The Microsoft mogul claimed that it wasn't really a retirement and prefers to call the action a "reprioritization". He said he wanted to focus more on his Gates Foundation to combat world poverty. The clip you will see below is probably one of the coolest and hilariously made videos I've ever seen. Money may not be able to buy you everything, but hey, money can buy you A LOT of things. Genius. Simply genius.

Movie Review: Bee Movie

I was able to watch the Bee Movie last Saturday with my sisters in the ever so glorious cinemas of Eastwood City. Truth be told, I wasn't aware that such movie existed until earlier that day when it was announced at breakfast table. So once again I went inside the movie house with absolutely no idea what I am about to watch or what to expect. I was actually more excited to watching the trailers.

Anyway, i digress. After a few minutes, the trailers concluded and the movie that we came here for opened up its act.  The next thing i know, the movie was over and a goofy smile was plastered on my face. Bee Movie is definitely a B movie. It's definitely a kid's movie. Everything about it is so light. The plot was elementary. The CGI was created for a younger audience. And the script was very easy to understand. It's something you'd watch with the family and the kids. In my case, it's something you'd watch after a week-long of hard work in the coal mines. (more…)

Power Failures, Stinky Elevators and Corporate Dark Ages

Ahh.. Feels good being able to write again in this sacred post editor. The past few days was really hectic in terms of workload. As much as I would like to rant about screwed weather patterns, crappy traffic, turtle-paced elevators and pot-bellied politicians, it's a "luxury" I cannot afford. And to make my excuses for my incompetence in blogging more credible, we had the misfortune of a day-long power failure yesterday in the office. So no sneaking-to-blog-time for me. 

I'm fascinated with power failures. It makes everything look…primitive. And since I work for an Internet company, I really felt it bigtime. The company relies on computers to make everything fully operational. So when this power failure struck like a hooligan yesterday, the company (rather, the employees) really suffered. We had to use of limited resources (only a couple of computers and laptops) and endure the stench and sweat of 50 "stubby" men (and women). It was the latter that really threatened my sanity. The air was too puffy I had to go out once in a while just for the sake of my lungs and brain. Then it struck me. Man has come to a point in history when we have become too dependent on technology. Imagine every computer in this country going haywire. That would be chaos. I mean, does LIFE really have to stop when technology halts itself? Yesterday was corporate dark-ages. Web designers had to use pencils. The finance and accounting peeps had to use abacuses.  The web developers resorted to their imaginations. And we marketing dudes had to base our analysis and decisions on astrology and horoscopes. Yeah man, it was that primitive. (more…)

A Letter To My Wisdom Tooth

Dear Wisdom Tooth,

    I believe we started off with the wrong foot here. When you came into my life a few years ago, you brought nothing but sleepless nights and painful mornings. You made sure my life was a living hell. For days you prohibited me from attending buffets and sumptuous dinners. I remember those days. I remember them like I remember my name. The memories still send shivers and cold sweat. Those were probably the darkest moments of my life. But I never hated you. I knew you were a part of me and hating you would be like hating myself. I forgave you for every excruciating pain you caused me. And I was thankful when your aggression abated. Our relationship improved. Then there was harmony. Or so I thought there was.

    Now, your tantrums are giving me troubles again. I'm beginning to think all this time you were merely playing me for a fool. I'm sorry to feel this way but I think you're nothing but a lying, treacherous, conspiring, spitting, no-good, low-life, pig-headed SOB. When I asked you why, you simply smirked and brought me more pain. I can't even eat Marie biscuits without crying like a girl. Your eyes told me everything. You wanted to kill me. Slowly and painfully. I hate you. (more…)

Erap Wants To Make You Laugh! Hahaha???

I heard from the primetime news last night that ex-president Joseph Estrada will make a comeback in the showbiz industry, but this time, as a comedian. Now this is weird news. The guy became popular as an action star in the 60s, became a national politician in the 80s, viewed as a hero of the masses in the 90s, got elected as president of this country a few years later, went through the whole political drama early this decade, convicted of plunder, and got pardoned late last year by the current president. Now he wants to become a comedian.

What's next Erap? Become an astronaut perhaps? And it keeps getting better: he also wants Ai Ai de las Alas to be his leading lady. This guy never fails to surprise us… Is he effing serious? After all the crap he went through (and all the crap WE went through because of him) he's actually considering going back to showbiz as a clown? Give me an effin' break. (more…)

My Predictions for 2008

I was supposed to write something about how we all seem to always botch up our new year resolutions as early as the third day of January. But I figured I would be writing something academic and analytical and I really did not feel like using my brain early today. So instead, I present to you my Soothsayer Predictions for 2008. Horaay!

This is an annual thing for me. Every start of the year, I would give my share of no-holes barred predictions to various stuff like politics, showbiz, economics, society, religion, etc. Most of the time, they come true. Last year I said that funny-hair-dude Trillanes would do a Round 2 of his coup circus acts. So when he actually did so last November, I just sat back, opened a can of Coke and gave my folks an i-told-you-smile. Anyway, I digress. I just hope somebody would take me seriously this time around. Without further adieu, my predictions for 2008.

The Headlines: 

• Chinese world domination and the location of Santa's workshop
  
• Another fictional character declared gay. Terrorists call it quits.
  
• Rise of mobile web and the fall of Facebook
• Japanese robots and the Britney Spears sex tape
• Read the details here.
  

(more…)

Everything Has A First…

A prosperous and happy new year to us all! May 2008 be one of the best years of our lives. May we all be blessed with happiness, wealth, and peace of mind. Cheers! New years are always good to start good things. This being said…

Welcome to my new blog, Wits version 2.0 : The Invasion. Those who have been frequenting this site are probably perplexed to this sudden development. I feel i owe you an explanation (discussed elsewhere). The gist is, The Exile of a Superstar was a child's handiwork. I think it's about time I move up to grade 1. Hence, an upgrade. And what better time to launch the second installment than the first day of the new year right? I tell you, it is a true statement of win.

So sit back, relax, and let me invade your minds with my ideas and musings. A new chapter has been turned. Lend me your thoughts as i trespass your cerebral walls with genius and win. View life's championships and suckages in my eyes. I will rant and rave until the world can take no more of it. Thank you for your undying support. You are the reason why this site is awesome.